Wednesday Already

This week has gotten away from me. This happened less often before the apocalypse began, but nowadays I have trouble telling days apart. I’m basically always tired and unmotivated to do much of anything outside of parenting in the mornings and working in the evenings. I am so beyond burnt out at this point that I can barely see straight.

That being said, I’m trying to do little stuff to keep myself calm and happy. I spent an hour yesterday cutting out pattern pieces to try to figure out a corset pattern for Carmilla. I’m also trying to organize all my cosplay stuff into a nifty planner. Anytime I start to feel crappy, or like I have no control over the world around me, organizing something that I can control helps. Once I get my cosplay organizer done, I’ll put some pictures of it up.

Maybe by then it’ll be Wednesday again.

Exhausted Again

Dear god, I’m tired. The last few weeks have blended together into one big slog of days and I’m starting to just feel tired all the time. My husband and I had to check with each other to confirm that it was, in fact, Tuesday, and not some other random weekday. I actually made some costuming progress today on Carmilla, in the approximately ten minutes of free time I had today, and would really like to write about that. But I can barely keep my eyes open, so it’ll have to wait until tomorrow.

Sweet Kitty

My cat has been especially affectionate over the last week. I’m not sure if she realizes that things are weird, thinks I must be really sick because I’ve been home so much lately, or is tuned into the fact that I’m kind of stressed. Either way, my normally mean and standoffish kitty has been laying in my lap on the couch every night for the last week. In fact, she’s laying on my lap right now as I type this.

My cat sleeping

Bored

Today has dragged on in the kind of way all the days have been dragging on recently. I’ve been equal parts watching my son and working from home, and now I’m starting on a bad headache. Hopefully that will pass.

I spent a little time today writing, just for the sake of my own sanity. I went back to a short story I had started on a while ago and left unfinished. I still like it, but I think it may be getting into “far longer than a short story” territory. Not that that’s a bad thing. It’ll just take me longer to actually finish it. Even if it doesn’t go anywhere, just getting to spend some time in a make-believe world is helping me feel a little better.

Nothing Doing

This whole week has been insanely boring. I’ve been working from home, but that is incredibly difficult when all of my home distractions are available, and I’d rather be doing any one of those things than working. The incessant worry isn’t helping with my focus either.

But, I’m going to try to cheer up. I don’t have to work tommorow, so I’ve got some fun indoor activities planned for myself. Hopefully that will take my mind off of things.

Confusing the Pets

My cat and dog don’t really understand why I’m home. The dog doesn’t really care. She’s just spent most of the day ignoring me and sleeping, same as she usually does. The cat, on the other hand, has been extremely interested in what I’m doing in the house. She’s spent most of the day following me around, then trying to strategically lay on me when she has the opportunity. I think she’s going to be even more confused tomorrow.

Sleepy kitty
Tired from a long day of having to follow me around

The Sun Through the Clouds

It was overcast and gloomy when I took my dog outside in the yard this evening. She needed to do her business and I needed to get out of the house for ten minutes and stop watching the god damned news about how the universe is slowly burning down around us all. While I was standing outside, urging her to pee and trying to keep calm, the clouds parted for half a second. The sky stayed dark, but the ground around me and everything I could see in front of me lit up.
I think it was what I needed to see when I was panicking and afraid. That even when the storm is here, and the sky is dark, there is still light. There is still good. It will be okay.